NEW SITE

Thank you to all who have been following the Essence of Strength blog at this site.  The blog has been relocated to the Essence of Strength website and can be found here http://www.essenceofstrength.com/blog/.  I look forward to connecting with you in our new space.

Be well,
Jattu

CHECK YOURSELF

Most of my adult life has involved existing with some level of exhaustion.  The problem with this is it set me up to normalize that sensation.  I don’t immediately recognize it as sign of disordered wellness the way one would a rash on the skin.  

Thankfully, these days I notice more quickly when I am veering off the wellness track.  The challenge is to determine whether it is just an episode of overtiredness or if I am ignoring the basic self-care habits I have set up for my life. 

Lately, I've noticed myself slipping into a consistent energy drain mode.  It made me remember that the path of well-being maintenance has no end.  Life is constantly changing so my methods to approach it need periodic modification.

In order to keep up with life’s curves I’ve learned to do a simple self-check when I am feeling out of sorts.

1.  SEE the truth about my current situation. 

Am I just having a crazy, busy week or have I overscheduled myself into a never-ending cycle of giving with no rest or renewal? 

Am I just being overly emotional about a particular disagreement or is this conflict representative of a pattern of dysfunction in a relationship?

To quote GI Joe, “Knowing is half the battle.”


2.  SEEK ways to improve my wellness status. 

If I see that adjustments need to be made, I have to figure out how to make that happen.  It may be a long-term plan with various milestones.  It may be an immediate drastic change. 

The key is to have the courage to make the decision to change instead of convincing myself I don’t see what I see.

3.  SEIZE my unique life purpose. 

Before I act on any decisions, I determine if it is in line with what I have determined to be my unique life purpose. 

This is where I have erred in the past.  I would see that a change needed to be made and I would make one just for the sake of being proactive. 

Although I tried to be purposeful, I didn’t have a good sense of what that purpose was.  I was much more vulnerable to doing what other people thought was a good idea for me. 

Now I seek out change that is purposeful for me.

4.  Those first three steps are all done in order to SUSTAIN my overall sense of well-being. 

In the past, I have been subject to falling into and out of wellness habits depending on the circumstances.  Now I feel capable of withstanding the changing tides of life with my well-being intact.

What is your process for ensuring you stay well?

BE STILL AND JUST BE

Sometimes I just need a little time to be.  Spending time being still centers me.  Whether it is called quiet time or meditation it is good for my soul. 

Many of us rush around so much we don’t take moments to be at one with ourselves and our surroundings. 

This is why yoga used to stress me out.  There was so much quiet and deep breathing.  I had no patience for all that. 

The stretching was nice but the perceived edict to be calm had the effect of making me tense.  I didn’t realize the fact I couldn’t stop my brain from racing was a clear sign I needed a mental time out.

Now I’ve recognized how important quiet time is.  I specifically set aside time for it. 

This time is distinct from Bible reading, journaling and exercise.  Those activities help me disconnect from some of life’s daily drama, but my mind isn’t able to completely release.

There is a level of conscious alertness that must be maintained to read, write or dodge cyclists on a path.  It’s not simply being in the way I need in order to clear my mind.

It is my experience that emptying my consciousness of everything can have two results.

When I am living life on purpose, setting my mind free takes me to a better place than I started.  I trust my spirit to do its thing, and I end up getting more clarity on how to sustain my wellness.

Wonderful things can happen in that stillness.  Sometimes there are powerful epiphanies.  Other times it is just a chance to marvel at how awesome the world is when I’m not messing with it.

However when I am ignoring my authentic truth, my spirit tells me about myself when I give it that opening to share.  I am forced to acknowledge the parts of my life that are clearly not on purpose for me.  It is still powerful, but it’s not necessarily the happiness and light one associates with meditation.

Back when I gave no thought to living on purpose, I saved up all my reflection time for vacations.  I knew it wouldn’t be fun and I didn’t want all that angst disrupting my normal day-to-day activities.   

If I got super bummed out on vacation, I could counter it with a day of skiing, hiking or sitting on a beach.  It kept me functioning but hardly thriving.

Nowadays, I’m not adherent to any particular meditation technique.  Over time, I’ve learned how to empty my mind, relax and tune into my spirit regardless of the environment.  

The change came when I got to a place where I trusted the truth that comes out of the stillness.  I no longer have to be on the defensive against what will happen when I go there.  Even if I don’t love it at the time, I know it is my truth and meant to keep me in line with my purpose.

The beauty of my life these days is striving for a consistent sense of well-being.  This keeps me from being afraid to sense my being.  I find comfort in stillness because it keeps me true to myself. 

I urge you to give it a try.  See where your spirit takes you when you let it lead.  Take a few minutes to be still and just be.

HOW DO YOU RELATE?

It seems I am supposed to be learning something about improving my personal interactions this month of May.  

My pastor is in the middle of a teaching series about practical ways to have better relationships. 

One of my coaching colleagues has been offering weekly challenges based on the life area of relationship.  

I personally chose to do a meditation on Romans 12.  This chapter of the Bible is all about how those of us who claim to love God are supposed to behave, particularly towards one another. 

All of this has made me think deeply about how I treat others and how I want to be treated in return.  I had planned to write something about what I’ve been learning in this week’s blog…then Maya Angelou died. 

As I read tributes to her and saw her quotes posted all over the internet, I realized Dr. Angelou had already said a lot of what I was thinking.  

There is no question her life experiences rendered her much wiser than I.  It seemed to me that sharing her thoughts on relationships would be more fitting right now.  

Here are some of my favorite quotes from this phenomenal woman about how to treat one another:

“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

“While I know myself as a creation of God, I am also obligated to realize and remember that everyone else and everything else are also God's creation.”

“Try to be a rainbow in someone's cloud.”

“If you have only one smile in you, give it to the people you love.”

“If you find it in your heart to care for somebody else, you will have succeeded.”

“Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.”

STRENGTHEN! SWEAT! STRETCH!

It is mentally and physically difficult to get conditioned after a prolonged break from exercise.  Your body feels foreign in that it is more weak, tired and slow than you remember it being.  Your mind is baffled by how weak, tired and slow your body is. 

You kind of just want to sit on a couch and eat ice cream instead of actually working out. 

The good news is since you have been fit before you have some sense that it is possible.  Less exciting is the reality of actually getting back to that level of fitness. 

When I came back to exercise after abdominal surgery, I made up my own regimen of strengthen, sweat and stretch.  This got my mind and body back into the routine of exercising three times per week while incorporating the essential components of fitness. 

Strengthen.  One day I did resistance exercise.  I did two sets of each exercise working the major muscle groups.  I performed a combination of free weight and bodyweight exercises.  Since I bore easily, I also used the TRX suspension trainer for more variety in my bodyweight exercises.  It was nice to feel my muscles get stronger.

Sweat.  Another day I did some form of cardiovascular exercise for at least 30 minutes.  Many people know I am a fan of a Beyonce Dance Party workout.  I’d just put on some Queen Bey and shake it like someone forgot to put a ring on it. 

More traditional cardio like walking, running, or the elliptical machine got mixed in also.  Running was humbling for me because I was slow and easily winded.  I had to remind myself the important thing was to get my body accustomed to moving for an extended period of time. 

Stretch.  The third day, I just focused on stretching each major muscle group for at least 30 seconds.  I am a fan of yoga, particularly Bikram, for the stretch day because it incorporates a bit of movement with the stretch.  This was a nice active recovery from the resistance and cardio.

This schedule was intentionally low-key and low intensity.  It was geared toward getting back into a workout routine more than getting into great shape quickly.  I had an incident with overexertion in my first postoperative week that scared me straight on not pushing it too early. 

Once the foundation was laid over a few weeks, I increased the time and frequency of exercise.  The key to getting fit is actually increasing the intensity of the workouts. 

Lift heavier.  Run longer.  Keep stretching. 

My main objective with exercise is to be healthy.  I had been fit in the past.  I trusted my body to get there again, but it was frustrating.  I know it must be that much worse for those starting to exercise for the first time.

Now when I am active in any way I appreciate the impact of my workouts on my body.  The squats strengthen my legs.  The runs improve my lung capacity.  The yoga helps me recover from both.

Listening to my body instead of freaking out about my measurements worked for me.  In exchange, God blessed me with the longest winter ever to get myself back into summer clothing shape.  Doing the right thing for yourself pays off sometimes.

I hope this encourages those who are working back from injury, surgery, or any extended break from fitness.  It is possible to come back.  As with everything under the sun though, it has to be the right way for you.

CHECK YOUR VISION

A lot of us are stymied in life by a lack of vision.  This manifests as flawed present and/or future vision.  Faulty present vision prevents us from clearly seeing what is actually occurring around us.  Lack of future vision makes us unable to conjure a different reality than the one we are living.  Both of these are problematic.

I like to think of myself as hopeful.  When I was unhappy during medical training, I kept believing everything would get better at the next stop.  I clearly saw that where I was didn’t fit my ideal, but I was assured by everyone it was coming around the bend. 

When I got into private practice, my present vision became clouded.  This was supposed to be the end point where all the dissatisfaction of training gave way to contentment.  When this obviously was not the case, I tried to convince myself the present wasn’t that bad.  

I was effectively putting scales on my eyes.  I needed to make the current situation seem better than it was because I couldn’t conceive of how to improve it.  My lack of future vision affected my present visual acuity.

We all do this on some level as a survival mechanism.  I totally get that.  However, it tends only to work short-term.  Eventually our spirits rip the blinders off and show us clearly, “This is some nonsense right here!”

We are forced to acknowledge that where we are is not good.  This is when the vision of a better future has to kick in.  And this is where a lot of us stall.  We make no change and complain about being in the same rut. 

We allow fear to keep us from dreaming of that best case scenario.  It seems impossible or unrealistic or too simple. 

For some of us, if the first place we see something is in our own minds we don’t feel it is valid.  We have to understand that just because we have never seen it in the real world doesn’t make it unachievable.

When I left medicine I knew I needed a new vision.  Eventually, I learned to expand my mind to the possibilities available to me in all aspects of my life.  This took some time and help from others. 

Rather than trying to fit myself into some pre-fabricated scenario, I learned to pick and choose what works for me to make the life I want.  I like what I see in my present and I am excited for what is coming in the future.

So, how’s your vision?

REINVENTING A CONTROL FREAK

I am a control freak…or at least I used to be. 

Whatever discipline, effort and commitment didn’t occur in me naturally was conditioned by the process of medical training.  You would be hard-pressed to find a physician without some control issues. 

When I decided to stop practicing medicine I tried to embrace being more carefree.  In reality, my time as a free spirit was more like a vacation.  It was nice to visit, but I wasn’t comfortable living there.

My personality is suited for schedules, lists and checkboxes.  I quit practicing medicine, but I didn’t stop being the person who became a physician. 

My naturally diligent tendencies have served me well in the past.  They can continue to do so in the future.  Here’s what I have learned so far.

I am very determined.  Once I decide to do something I am exceptionally good at powering through and staying on task.  

Many people think the most common characteristic among doctors is intelligence.  In fact, it is a scary level of determination. 

There is a drawback to this type of determination for me.  It can lead to feeling stuck when I’m trying to figure out my next step.  My resolve to follow through on my decisions ends up putting too much importance on every single one. 

My determination has sustained me through some difficult times in the past.  The first sign of a challenge does not send me running away from something I really want. 

However, I’ve had to learn not to be paralyzed by the prospect of being wrong about where to apply that dedication.

I like having a plan.  It is logistically simpler to be determined if one has an explicit plan. 

Medical training was nice for that.  Everything had a delineated order starting with the MCAT and ending at the first job after residency or fellowship.  All I had to do was keep my focus on the end goal.    

Unfortunately, having such tunnel vision can prevent recognition of when it is time to bail.  It doesn’t allow for alternative options if the original plan is in total conflict with my spirit. 

It also blunts creativity if I just want to switch things up a bit.

Nowadays I still prefer to work with a plan.  Having one helps me feel secure, even if it is just a framework from which to freestyle. 

However, this plan is always subject to revision when it makes sense in my spirit to do so. 

I like doing things my way.  My methods have been pretty effective at generating positive results for me over the years.  

I do not force my way of doing things on others.  I just stick with what I think works best for me. 

This becomes problematic when others offer me unsolicited advice.  It is hard for me to accept it since I don’t have the same data on their outcomes as I have on mine. 

I’m also less inclined to take suggestions that seem more self-serving to the tipster than beneficial to me.  Although, I’ve learned there is some merit in recommendations derived with no consideration of my point of view. 

When it comes to getting tasks accomplished, my perspective has served me well.  However, there are areas of my life that are more about being than doing.  These have benefitted from an outsider’s take. 

Several times I only took a new approach to my own well-being because someone else pointed out how crazy my way was.  

My way is good, but not perfect.

I take responsibility.  I always consider the repercussions my decisions have on other people. 

Even if negative consequences are unintended, I always take stock of what my actions may have done to precipitate them.  Similarly, I also think about how my inaction may have caused undesired outcomes. 

This can get a bit heavy on the head.  It was particularly burdensome when I was practicing medicine. 

Responsibility can be an inconvenience but it shouldn’t be oppressive.

Also, taking control of certain situations may rob others of the opportunity to step into the fullness of their capabilities.  The greatest good is rarely served by stifling the maturation process of another.

I believe it is good to be a responsible, caring adult.  People know they can trust and depend on you. 

However, I have to remember my part in any result, good or bad, is usually not as great as I take credit for.  I am not God.

These days I prefer to consider myself conscientious rather than a control freak.  The same qualities that made me feel restricted in the past have been reimagined to support my unique Divine purpose. 

Now my life is not about being in control, but rather discerning how to use my God-given traits to maintain my authentic joy and peace.